Dream Madam Activist

By Ore Afolayan

Back then as an Undergraduate at the University of Ibadan, vividly can I remember how politicians invade my alma-mater to visit members of the University.

It should be noted that these (intending) public office holders come around few weeks to elections that they are billed to partake in. And the motives of the visits? To solicit support from the learned.

However, the students and their leaders tend to be class of individuals that are usually interested in listening and negotiating with the politicians on behalf of the University. The academic and non-academic staff tend to mind their businesses.

As electioneering proceedings unfold, these celebrated looters begin to come in, with money or to donate television sets, DSTV dishes and decoders, power generators as done by former Oyo state governor, Alao Akala in 2011.

Asides the monetary, gift items cum promises of politicians that will be on show, students tend to introduce schemes to earn more. They carry out these gimmicks by using various devices. Notable among them is the organization and mobilization of other students for a rally. Often times, this act tend to bring the greatest returns with sums running to half a million naira.

Apparently, one self-styled prominent Nigerian female activist has employed this epic money-making strategy as she floated a rally few days to the Presidential elections.

While watching the dollar-induced rally that led to verbal and physical brawls on tv among hungry participants, I saw the nation’s treasurer(The Co-ordinating Minister of Finance) at the rally. The nation’s madam might have given the other madam a sum to pay the likes of Naeto C, Terry G etal that were at the show of shame.

In a tweet, the rally’s organizer said that the rally was initially planned for the North, but for the soldiers reclaiming the seized areas from Nigeria’s infamous insurgents. Then, I ask, if the soldiers are bringing results already, of what use is her rally? Asides that, must your rally be Lagos and Abuja? An avenue to be seen and garner more relevance. What happened to Kebbi and Sokoto; is the army reclaiming lands there?

It is eye-sore that we now live in a country where activists and social crusaders bear self-centred motives for their demonstrations, thereby becoming the traducers of our democracy.
This must stop! This is a far cry from what we had in the Fawehinmis and the SaroWiwas.

Should you persist in your rallies, dear prominent activist, I know for sure that you have automobiles that can convey you to your rally points. However, for the sake of humanity, the Nigerian sun is not healthy psychologically and physiologically for the youths. It’s on that note that the youths posit that they will do the needful come 28th of March, and therefore do not need any rally to get it right.

Till you organize a rally against the missing $20billion or a rally against those against the PVC card reader, or a rally against the immigration job hunting farce, Dear madam activist, I will not take you serious.

Advertisements

How to make a great informative speech

1. Be a knowledgeable speaker- By being a knowledgeable speaker, I mean that it is of essence you have a firm know-how of what you want to talk about.

2. Have a systematic pattern of speech delivery- By this, I mean that your speech must have an introduction, a body and a conclusion. And this pattern should be followed to the latter.

3. Audience’s knowledge must equal speaker- The knowledge that you believe that your audience has must match yours; be it too little or too much.

4. Determine your objectives- What is the aim of your presentation? Have that in mind before opening your mouth to speak.

5. Research your topic- As earlier suggested, asides being a knowledgeable speaker, have knowledge on the topic you want to speak on.

6. Outline your points- Points should be identified and brought to fore to buttress the facts that you’re presenting.

Ore Afolayan
CTO, Fuzzy Logic Systems

15 reasons why you should vote Goodluck Jonathan

As the 2015 elections draw near, it is important to identify 15 core reasons why the incumbent president should be re-elected into office. These laudable reasons are worthwhile ventures/projects Mr. Jonathan is proud of, as another electioneering process approaches. These reasons include:
1.TOTAL REMOVAL OF FUEL SUBSIDY:
Come July 2015, he will fully remove the fuel subsidy. Hence, the sufferings of Nigerians will significantly increase.
2.PURCHASE OF NEW JETS:
With public funds will he purchase tear-rubber, factory-fitted FalconX
flying jets worth 8million each.
1.OPERATION FEED THE PRESIDENT:
With N1billion, cassava bread will be his daily meal over
the course of a year. Thereby, ensuring that the number one citizen is well fed and well bred. This
Operation Feed The President (OFP) will be carried out side by side famine in the land.
1.THE FIRST LADY IS COMING, CLEAR THE ROAD:
While in office, Nigerian roads will be blocked, disabling Nigerians from heading to offices, markets et al because The First Lady (an individual who holds no executive position and not elected by the citizens) wants to ply the road.
1.# TakeMoreOfOurGirls:
More girls may go missing and the Presidency will as usual, fail to
rescue them.
1.SCRATCH MY BACK, I SCRATCH YOURS:
Since N21billion have been raised and donated by individuals in the society for Jonathan’s campaign,
these rational businessmen will look forward to the President fulfilling his side of the bargain by
awarding them with unmerited contracts and/or political appointments.
1.IF THEY DON’T RETURN HOME, KILL THEM:
Many more Nigerians living in diaspora will be
killed for offences they know virtually nothing about while the President and/or the ambassadors to
such lands wines and dines with the Heads of Government over jobs well executed.
1.PRIORITIES OVER PRIORITIES:
The President will either go for a campaign rally or go celebrate with
an ‘icon’ who adds a year as Nigerians are bombed into oblivion.
1.THEY WOULD COME OUT OF THEIR SHELLS:
More Bode Georges, Diepreye Alamaiseghas will be released from custody or given Presidential
Pardons and will be celebrated and paraded as role models for upcoming looters. Not only that, they
would be conferred with GCON, OFN, CFR judging by the amount of loot the looter was able to cart
with. The higher the loot, the higher the award, the lower the loot, the lower the award.
1.FEDERAL UNIVERSITY STUDENTS, YOU’RE AT RISK:
More Federal Universities stand the risk of having a name change. As changing UNILAG to
MAULAG was a more important priority than curbing insurgency. Uites, Awoites take note.
1.MORE CLAUSES WILL BE BIRTHED:
More nonsensical clauses such as ‘Stealing is not corruption’ will come from the Presidency. Thereby,
encouraging crimes such as pickpocketing, burglary in the Nigerian social space as the
Number 1 citizen had given a nod to Stealing.
1.YOU STAND A CHANCE OF BEING APPOINTED MINISTER:
It does not matter what your area of expertise is, you stand a chance of serving in the
government provided you are another potential Diezani, Labaran or Wike.
1.THE NAIRA WILL BE COMPETING WITH THE ZIMBABWEAN DOLLAR IN ROCK BOTTOM:
The N185 to an US Dollar will be a thing of the past as it would have doubled few months after he enters
office. Most likely, N370 per American dollar.
1.OPERATION KILL MORE STUDENTS: More students will be dragged out of their rooms in the
dead of the night to be shot in the open as the Presidency has been slow and unable to curb or
even curtail insurgency.
2.THE ASO ROCK ZOO IS THE NEW NIGERIA AND ITS ANIMALS, THE NEW NIGERIAN CITIZENS
Another N15million will be spent on horses for the Aso Rock Zoo, N14.5million would be expended on
more wild animals and another N800million to upgrade the Zoo. Welfare at its peak…Vote Wisely!
Ore Afolayan.
Director of Public Media,
Progressive Students of Nigeria.

Kisses from the hawkers

Its an intrinsic occurrence
A duty they perform
A trade they carry on
A job they do
A task they undertake
Setting out early in myrmidon manner
Toiling daily
Footling sheepishly but relentlessly
Traversing some sordid,sleazy nooks and crannies of town
Entertaining all manner of abuse or molestation, brow-beaten
Enduring most ruthless weather conditions
Generating only a few peanuts in the end.
Oh lord, come to their plight.

Voice behind the darkness

VOICE BEHIND THE DARKNESS
OUT OF HARDSHIP A LIFE WAS
BORN.GREW LIKE A VOLCANIC
ERUPTION.IT IS CERTAIN HIS PATH
IS BOUND TO SEE DISTRUCTION.
IF I AM MADE TO SIT ON A HOT
LAVA,HOW CAN YOU AND I
DIALOGUE
YOU GAVE ME A MENTAL
EXCITEMENT
AND CALL IT ENLIGHTMENT.
YOU TOOK AWAY MY RAGE AND
ASK ME
TO BE BRAVE.YOUR EDUCATION IS
PRINCIPAL.WHAT ABOUT MY
PRINCIPLE.
NOW I CAN READ AND WRITE.BUT I
HAVE
NO VOICE.I AM NO MORE A SLAVE
BUT A
DEPENDANT.THANKS FOR
DEMOCRATIC GIFT.
POLITICALLY I AM ABLE.ECONOMIC
WISE
I AM DISABLE.
TRADE BY BARTER.YOU GAVE ME A
RELIGION
INSTEAD I GAVE YOU MY
REGION.MY LAND,WATERS
CULTURE,FAMILIES AND MOST OF
ALL MY PRIDE.
NOW THAT I AM NAKED.YOU
CLOTH ME WITH
FRAGMENT OF CHAOS STITCH
TOGETHER CALLED
AFRICA,AFRICAN,AFRICAN
AMERICAN AND NEGRO
NONE OF THESE WERE YOUR NAME.
EVERYTHING YOU TOOK AWAY
FROM ME CAN NOT
BUY YOU PEACE.CONTINUE TO
STRIP ME OF MY
VIRTUE.SENTENCE ME TO
DEATH.WHILE MY VOICE
FILL THE JAIL YOU BUILT WITH MY
SWEAT.
ONE THING IS CERTAIN YOU CAN
NOT STOP THE
RAGE AND UPRISING I WILL SPREAD
IN CITIES
OF THE WORLD.
LISTEN TO THE VOICE BEHIND THE
DARKNESS.

Human Husbandry

It was not always like this,
nature, granted to offer
bliss.
A few centuries back,
life on our paradise was
black.
And God made man in his
own image,
and man thought his fellow
was garbage.
So the white man travelled
thousand of miles nautical,
just to put a human lie to
an order biblical.
And to think he bore a bible
for black eyes to see,
and to think he conspired
with this very seal.
Animal husbandry is not
amiss,
but human husbandry was
not so seen.
Mark you! the story I tell,
was not just of foreign hell.
Some warriors, now turn
stones,
were culprits over their
brothers bones.
They waged wars to waste
their fellows,
kill,capture and cage them
like felons
.
So was the evil which
Badagry housed,
before a bright day when
the fire doused
.
Was a clasp of colours,
white and black,
a handshake of two soiled
hands
.
One willy, white, wavering,
wicked and wayward,
the other brutish, black, bad
and backward
.
Did it not start with Henry
the navigator,
who had the souls of adder
and alligator
.
In the course of his wide
and wild wandering,
sent demons on seafaring.
So from Hell and Portugal,
the hosts of Hades
happened on Africa
.
They saw strength in black
untold,
and their rile-reel began to
unfold
.
These blacks would be good
beasts,
for farms and hard chores
on list
.
They took a set sample to
their home,
and so the spirit of man
was on hold.
Before a spit could land and
dry,
hordes of raiders rode from
Europe to try.
Never mind that the African
sun could fry,
never mind that the Atlantic
tide could rise so high.
After they dropped the
mask of Christ,
which they first wore to
stage the heist.
They sold guns, booze and
mirrors to morons
,
and took flesh, lives, bloods
and active hormones
.
To work the strange icy
fields,
far away in West Indies.
That was the foundation of
men’s sale,
and the same spring caught
in it a wail.
To plant and pull in
America,
while sprayed and jaded
they left Africa
.
At the end of it, half a
million blacks,
had been hunted, killed,
and caught in fact.
Just from the Badagry coast
alone,
not counting or costing the
Calabar drove.
When they yank babes off
mothers’ bosom
,
ending the course of natural
blossom.
They tied knaves’ neck with
iron rope,
designed to leave the mind
in a grope
.
Apart from the lace on their
necks,
on their legs are metal
anklets
.
One heavy step after
another,
they walked on fire and
pain and seldom faltered
.
For to falter was to fall,
and to fall was to be felled.
You could not dare to dash
for freedom,
large canines abound to
devour.
Or on a lone tree,
a man is freed
.
Tied, staked awkwardly,
so the harm comes bodily.
Till the ghost flees to
serenity,
from the hold of man’s
insanity.
For stubborn slaves, there is
a pin,
which is designed to tame
and rein in
.
One painful jab,
One painful stab.
And some were known to
have bled,
bled all the way to their
death
.
After force enforces calm,
and only eyes-daggers rule
the camp
.
There is one more tale to
tell,
that of the spirit
attenuation well
.
But before that, here was
how they drank,
one metal bowl for file and
rank.
And all must lap like lame,
heads clashing and iron
cutting like blade
.
Before assuaging the blood
thirst,
the bowl builds blood first
.
From the contribution of
contending slaves
,
for failure to drink might be
the end of such loaves
.
Since the water came only
once,
the water which for blood
swaps
.
Now what do you know of
attenuation,
let me save you the pains of
contemplation.
For you to understand this
thing,
we must course back to the
15th century Latin.

The Home-call

A message from the far country,
Meant for the world;
Read by millions;
Believed by the humble;
Prayed about by the wise.
Though,
Seas shall be crossed;
Islands explored;
Knowledge multiplied;
Wisdom form a pyramid;
All souls,
shall outlive the sun,
Human spirit,
will never sail into extinction.
In a country,
In a year,
In a day,
In a place,
the body and soul shall separate.
No complaint,
No excuse,
No appeal,
No lying-lawyer,
All souls shall answer the home-call.
The beautiful for the ugly earth,
The high for the dust below,
Dust back to the dust,
But the soul flies away.
The last drama,
For the deceased to sit quietly,
As if alive under the word,
“Obituary”,
And honoured with “Late”,
The 4-letter title that follows suit,
For the rest of eternity.
To tell every man,
That can read,
That he was once a dweller,
Of this patched land,
Fragile and limited,
As birds of passage,
Accorded but with a fleeting glory.
Arise,
The sun is setting,
Darkness is coming,
Take advantage,
Grasp opportunity,
It has been religion,
All the while,
Now it’s time,
For true salvation,
Now is making holiness your heartbeat,
Get enlisted for heaven,
While salvation is cheap,
And your spirit is willing.
So,
I’ve been told,
Soon i inhaled earth’s air,
Long Long Long Time Ago,
The story of the Home-call.